Skip to main content

Long day.

I would love to know how when things get to a certain point, it is so hard to stay positive. I am one small person. I struggle daily with figuring out who and what I am. I struggle with self esteem and feeling worth something. I struggle to find myself in time, when a minute feels like an hour. I struggle with balancing school and work. I struggle with the idea of being alone. I struggle with getting to sleep at night. I struggle with feeling like I'm making a difference. I struggle..a lot. Do not get me wrong though, just because right now I'm barely breathing that doesn't mean I'm dead. This struggle is temporary. I know life is hard, I know it's supposed to be. I know that no matter what I have people that love me, even if I don't deserve it. I know that one day, this will all be worth it. I know that even though I am crazy and emotional right now there is a good chance that tomorrow will be better. I have so much hope. Hope a lot of times is the only thing that keeps me going. Well, hope and faith. The most complex thing for me to understand is the mercy our Savior has shown for me. I don't feel like I'm worth forgiving lot of times, and it's not easy to find that peace. It is there though, he is always there.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

102 Days.

Well Folks, it's been exactly 102 days since my car left home and headed out west. Each day that I'm away from home I discover more about myself, my relationships, and my Heavenly Father. It's hard to place a time or a date to your life changing especially when it happens over a period of time and through many hard lessons. Now more than ever I realize the importance of relying on my Heavenly Father in all times, in all things, and in all places. I have such a testimony of the love my Savior gives me. He is my constant companion and he is my everything. At times things can get dark and things can get lonely. During these moments of trial we too often forget our divine worth. We were all sent here with a unique and special plan. We were destined for greatness and we were destined to allow ourselves to achieve that divine potential. I have learned to never give up on my Savior, because when I don't give up on him I don't give up on myself. These past 102 days have...

Coming to an end.

Considering my last post was in October, this morning I woke up and finally wanted to let the fingers type and do the talking. Since October my life has changed and I have grown so much. I always knew I wanted to be a teacher and I also always knew that I have both of my parents running through my blood. What this means for me is that I have this incredible drive to push myself to limits that haven't been set. My beautiful mother gave me passion for education. She constantly sets the example of the most excellent educator and one day I hope to be as successful as she is and was in the classroom. My mother gave me the realistic expectations that come with teaching, such as not always getting my way or having things work out in the way I would like them to. Bless her soul for being my constant supporter. My father gave me the drive to work hard and to never give up. He works construction and there hasn't been one thing that he hasn't finished once he set his mind to it. He...

Knowing thy IMPACT

One day I'll get around to sharing the story about how I applied for and got my new job. I have to say that it most certainly is 100% credited to my Heavenly Father and his plan for my life. Often we don't see the things we need in life until things are put into our path that lead us in a different direction. For the purpose of this post I wanted to share some thoughts being on the outside of the beginning of a new school year. This is mostly for my teacher friends and those who start teaching this year so if you get bored, please do yourself a favor and stop reading. Being a teacher is a tough gig. Daily we make thousands of split-second decisions and impact people in ways we will never fully know the extent of. John Hattie once said, "know thy impact." Each day you'll strive to be better than the day before. You'll hope and pray that your babies (students) will learn something more than just "things." We'll hope and pray that they learn how t...